how come?

How come I dreaded today, and then enjoyed it? but how come you didn't hold my hand? or hug me like you promised? and how come it wasn't like the movies? how come I told my family it was akward? because it totally wasn't. except for the end, cuz goodbyes suck. But then how come I still don't know how I feel? how come sometimes all I want is for you to hold my hand, but when you are here, you don't? And then when someone askes me, I don't want you to? how come you live so far away? and would things be different if you didn't? how come the silence is so comfortable, when all I want is for you to talk? and how come I want you to talk, when you have nothing to say? and for that matter, how come I don't talk? how come I loose all of my words when I am with you? how come I can't catch my breath? and how come I didn't say all the things I wanted to say? how come it has to be so complecated? how come we talk but nothing gets said? how come you aren't like the guys in all of the movies? how come you don't say the right thing? how come nothing makes sense to me anymore? how come everything goes against my plans? how come I don't have any plans? how come you don't throw stones at my window? or fly to my window? how come you don't take my hand and run away? how come you didn't buy my coffee or open my door? how come you didn't come to the door to pick me up? how come I'm scared of telling you everything that I want to say? how come I'm scared of you? how come you bite your nails? and how come you sat down on the bridge? how come you make too many awkward situations?
how come I have so many unanswered questions? and how come no one will answer them?

Laurel