friends?

I'm not an outwardly sentimental person, if you know what I mean. I won't greet you with a hug, inless you are someone I'm REALLY close to, I won't tell you alot of my feelings. But right now, I really miss one of my friends. and its not like they have moved away or anything, its just they seemed to have removed me from their life. Its not like the two of us were like peas in a pod or anything, its just we used to hang out alot more than we used to. hm. Like going for Chineese after church and stuff. we dont' do that anymore. In fact, I've stopped expecting to see this person at church every sunday. and honestly it makes me really sad.
My mom says that I am a really loyal friend. I guess that when I say I'm gonna do something, I actually stick to it, no matter what in my life I have to sacrifice. and If I see that there is something I need to do to make someone else's life even a little bit better, I'll go that extra mile to make someone smile in a day. I also believe that relationships are what really matter in this life. more than anything else.
I guess what I'm getting at here, is that not only with this one person, but alot of my friends, I have noticed that I put in alot more than I get. not like I'm selfish or anything, because thats not what I want, I don't want to take and take and take. all I want is someone to return my emails, or be the one to phone me and ask me if I want to go out.

Idunno. this week I've seemed to completely loose all direction I had in my life. I don't know anything for sure anymore. and the worst part of it is I have no idea who I should or can turn to to talk about this with.

Laurel