Life and Love, and .....Happiness?

Mom says the best thing is to tell the truth, the worst thing to do in a situation is to not tell the truth. but what if I don't know what the truth is? what do I say then? what if we talk before I know? do I just say that I have no answers? do I explain why I am confused? or do I just avoid the situation. Mom also says that untill they tell me, I don't have to worry about it. But, Mom, you don't understand how things like this get me, how I get so involved emotionally. Emotions; sometimes, alot of times, they really suck. I hate how being a girl makes me this emotional wreack, whenever something like this happens. I'm not even supposed to know yet. thats the worst part. so me talking to anyone about it is gossip. what a way to ruin a friendship.
Tommorow, I start grade 12. what should be a glorious last year is gonna be hell. or worse. I don't know how I'm gonna do it. I don't know how I'm gonna do tommorow. how am I gonna walk amongst people I haven't seen or talked to in 6 months? become like them again? avoid conforming to them? how am I gonna go back to being treated like a child agian?
Looking at the clock at 11:11 the past four times sucks. Make it change.
Laurel